Author Topic: What is grammar ?  (Read 543 times)

Guzman

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What is grammar ?
« on: July 27, 2017, 03:36:52 PM »
Ok mr Barabababababababababababa (whatever your username is) feel free to add your input here.

I think what grammar actually is is this........literal etiquacy .  Etiquacy applied to written word.   Its like when we were children, our parents and grand parents corrected us if we pronounced "water" as "war err" instead of "war tur".

Of course ill put more effort and care into what i write if its for something like a job application form.  I'll even read it over 2 or 3 times over before it hits the post box.   I know that good grammar is to write "did not" instead of "didnt".  I know its not good grammar aswell to begin a sentence with "Because".   But when i post on an internet forum, im not at work im at home.  Ive let my hair down i dont have to have my best foot forward.   Surely people out there have got more to worry about and get uppity about than someones spelling and grammar on an internet forum or message board?.  Personally i dont make a big deal out of it inless i actually struggle to read it, as in its at the point where my eyes are gonna bleed.     What are you people like in real life?, do you go around making fun out of the way someone talks and pronounces things?, if so i bet that gets you far in life as far as social harmony.

I will exercise good grammar when its vital, like a job application form.  I remember something that a teacher on a further education course (the same place the masonry paint prank happend) said to me once, he said this (in a scottish accent) "Now Rob....please dont think that im just nit picking here when i say this, im not nit picking,  im honestly telling you how it is.  How your job application form looks is totally paramount.   It doesnt matter how qualified you are, nor does it matter how much experience you already have in that field of work, if you hand in a job application form with hand writing that doesnt look neat, that it looks scruffy and looks like you have rushed it, especially if its hard to read.  And you hand in a job application form with words poorly spelt, poor grammar, where it suggests that you havent taken the trouble to use a dictionary to spell words that you are not sure about, questions that havent been answer properly or at all, because you havent thoroughly read the question.......then none of those other things will even matter......your application form is not going to end up in a short list......there's only one place it will end up (then gestures to put it in a waste paper bin)"

There's one job application form question that i hate, and to be honest i dont know why it has to be asked.  Luckily i have only ever been asked it once.   "Please state to us what your strengths and weakness's are?".  The strengths part is not a stumbling block, this is your chance to put yourself over, but the weakness's part?.  Come on, that defeats the whole point of writing up a job application form.  Im trying to entice you to want to hire me, not do the opposite!!!.  And if i dont put something that does not sound bad, well it aint a weakness then is it?.

Oh i get it.....so this job application form is not about you asking me questions and wanting to know my honest answers and input, its a game of....we ask questions, you gotta know how to answer them and know what we wanna here.   What a bunch of crud that is.   This question here is kind of like that, but not as bad.  "Where do you see yourself in 5 years time?".   They dont wanna here "running my own successful business" or "being a moviestar in hollywood" or "being a successful pop star signed to a prestigious label".  No no no no....they wanna hear an answer that involves you still being within their company right?.

Sven

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Re: What is grammar ?
« Reply #1 on: July 28, 2017, 12:09:46 AM »
Are you still working at ASDA or Aldi?

Q13.1

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Re: What is grammar ?
« Reply #2 on: July 28, 2017, 12:35:39 AM »
Are you still working at ASDA or Aldi?

And your imputation is by this comment? Not working at PWC or Goldmans. WTF !
Lay off him or you will be next crying tears for driving him off too.
Where is Mac?
And your picture of Clive?

Sven

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Re: What is grammar ?
« Reply #3 on: July 28, 2017, 12:40:50 AM »
And your imputation is by this comment? Not working at PWC or Goldmans. WTF !
Lay off him or you will be next crying tears for driving him off too.
Where is Mac?
And your picture of Clive?

When do I cry for driving people away?

I am actually interested in if Guz works in either supermarket. He would have stayed in a job longer than I have in the past seven years if he has!

bababarararacucucudadada

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Re: What is grammar ?
« Reply #4 on: July 28, 2017, 01:01:10 AM »
Your ambition to create a properly coherent application for a job will never be achieved if you don't what the words you are trying to use actually are.

Around 25 years ago I was an underling who had a boss, of sorts (he was in a superior position within the company to me anyway), who was basically as thick as fuck and had been promoted beyond his ability through a mixture of bullshit, brown-nosing and bare-faced lies. He was a nice enough chap but he was out of his depth because he had to produce written procedures for a variety of tasks and his literacy skills just weren't up to snuff.

It was with some glee that he showed me his first 100% perfect document (already submitted around a bunch of departments to a raft of departmental managers) absolutely confident that he'd cracked it: "I know it is right: I've run Spellcheck across it...". 25 years ago Spellcheck was still hot shit and innovative but it wasn't as good as it is today...

Needless to say it wasn't 100% perfect. There were no spelling mistakes, granted, but some of the words were the wrong ones: surly instead of surely; there instead of their etc. Being a Charlie (one for Q there!) he had no idea.

This is why I correct you for "would of" etc. Quite simply you don't appear to know what it is you are saying or trying to say or that it is wrong or why it is wrong. And it is. It is always wrong. It has never been right. Not anywhere. Not ever. Nor will it ever be. Couldn't be wronger.

It is not a spelling mistake. The words are spelled correctly. It's not even grammatically wrong, as such, because it is so far off the scale wrong that grammar is meaningless to it. It is just wrong wrong wrong wrong. The two words do not go together. It is meaningless drivel. It, quite literally, has no meaning. It is totally incoherent.

And the problem is that you do not identify this. You still think it is right. You even gave that Alan Sugar thing as an example of why it was right when it was actually no such thing and supported your, admittedly non-existant, argument in no way whatsoever. In fact it did the reverse.

As an aside do you know why you should not start a sentence with "because"? And plurals like "apostrophe's" are wrong, by the way, but one thing at a time.

Think on this for a moment: good grammar is the difference between knowing your shit and showing you're shit.


Sven

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Re: What is grammar ?
« Reply #5 on: July 28, 2017, 01:18:57 AM »
Oh yes, I have been trying and failing to get a Clive picture.

He does not like being photographed it seems.

Tonight in the dog park the Po-po asked me if I had seen a child wandering the woods. I had not, but this is the first time it seems that they have joined me in a paedophile hunt.

They did not want to say much, just that if I saw a really obvious child, I should call them.

Natural Mystic

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Re: What is grammar ?
« Reply #6 on: July 28, 2017, 01:58:33 PM »
My achilles heal, badly written and/or spoken English grammar ... just sayin  - my son hates it too mind

Sven

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Re: What is grammar ?
« Reply #7 on: July 29, 2017, 12:58:37 AM »
My achilles heal, badly written and/or spoken English grammar ... just sayin  - my son hates it too mind

Your son hates you selling your arse to men?

Sorry, your grammar is so bad, that is all I got! :P

bababarararacucucudadada

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Re: What is grammar ?
« Reply #8 on: July 29, 2017, 09:29:37 PM »
Does this shit matter? Read this.


bababarararacucucudadada

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Re: What is grammar ?
« Reply #9 on: July 30, 2017, 02:01:27 AM »
So far as I know it is a free world and I'll post as I please if that's all the same to  you.

I didn't start the thread.

And until now I don't think I'd picked up on any of his, or anybody else's, spelling or grammatical mistakes other than the "would of" family ones which I must admit are a pet hate.

So far as I am concerned it starts and stops with the "would ofs" but it was Guzman who asked "what is grammar" (it is there in Guzman's thread title if you look hard enough) which broadens it out a little.
« Last Edit: July 30, 2017, 02:03:51 AM by bababarararacucucudadada »

Q13.1

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Re: What is grammar ?
« Reply #10 on: July 30, 2017, 03:16:14 PM »
So far as I know it is a free world and I'll post as I please if that's all the same to  you.

I didn't start the thread.

And until now I don't think I'd picked up on any of his, or anybody else's, spelling or grammatical mistakes other than the "would of" family ones which I must admit are a pet hate.

So far as I am concerned it starts and stops with the "would ofs" but it was Guzman who asked "what is grammar" (it is there in Guzman's thread title if you look hard enough) which broadens it out a little.

Apologies Barbar.

Sven

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Re: What is grammar ?
« Reply #11 on: July 30, 2017, 05:31:38 PM »
Apologies Barbar.

I know that you do not want people to pick on one another here.

However, Guz does need some brutal honesty, otherwise he thinks he is being very clever.

I am really really holding back on him here. It's hard!

Guzman

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Re: What is grammar ?
« Reply #12 on: July 30, 2017, 06:22:06 PM »
Does this shit matter? Read this.



I think this is a "how long is a piece of string" type question.

First off.....who wrote all that?, a 7 year old?, a 10 year old?, a 15 year old?.  If it was a 7 year old, then i think thats holding rather high standards if your going to regard it as abysmal.  Where as if thats the works of a 14 or 15 year old and their wanting to gain an O level or A Level, then they need to be told to really pull their socks up.

If they are 16 or over then this is real cause for concern, because it comes back to the "job application form" thingy.  I think you constantly being on my case though about typing "would of" instead of "would have" is just you acting upon a personal pet peeve more than anything else

bababarararacucucudadada

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Re: What is grammar ?
« Reply #13 on: July 30, 2017, 06:50:41 PM »
I have no idea who wrote it but a small child is my guess. It is just an innocent series of mistakes just as all of us embarking on a learning curve might make. I posted it for its rather sweet but horrific unintended wordplay. I thought it was gigglesome and illustrative.

So three direct but simple questions to Guzman:

1. Do you accept that "would of" is always without exception plain wrong?

2. If you do accept that it is always and without exception plain wrong are you aware of why that is so?

3. If the truthful answer to the 2 previous questions is "yes" why do you keep using it?

Q13.1

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Re: What is grammar ?
« Reply #14 on: July 30, 2017, 10:44:35 PM »
A dear friend of mine wrote this to me today when I asked him if he had done the Hajj :

Cos must do any mistake
after the haje.

I will visit it whene i will
have 55 years off.
Lost in translation poor grammar.
Of course it is not acceptable that educational standards have declined so much in recent decades that poor grammar and spellings have become acceptable.
My mother told me she did "penmanship" at school. it was indocrinated into her all colourful flourishes.
Look at old manuscripts whatever and see how people wrote uttter sheit but it looked beautiful and the grammar was correct.

I am in no way condoning poor literacy standards. However, when kids go to schools or live in communities where 127 languages are spoken, the english language and use of it is morphing.

It is called globilisation I beleive and something remainers should accept. See I am so screwed up I should spell check every third word. That is when I can correctly aim my fingers toward a keyboard. I do not know what the big issue is with Guz. Ignorance is a trait which prevails upon people all the time, I was lucky I read these oh how un bloody pc these days. 

I will take time out to read the op post. The post here about hores etc, well without the back story it is irrelevant, what if it was filled with profanities? Could be an adult with Tourrettes.

Jesus christ that ladybird book I do own. Kids saying come play with us! How acceptable would such terminlogy be these days?
« Last Edit: July 30, 2017, 10:51:47 PM by Q13.1 »