Random Banter

Slightly More Important => Entertainment => Topic started by: bababarararacucucudadada on June 08, 2017, 07:16:37 PM

Title: Poetry
Post by: bababarararacucucudadada on June 08, 2017, 07:16:37 PM
I note the sad absence of poetry on here.

So here y'are.

http://youtu.be/g-aVtKEhpO0?t=36 (http://youtu.be/g-aVtKEhpO0?t=36)

If the cap fits etc.
Title: Re: Poetry
Post by: bababarararacucucudadada on June 15, 2017, 11:18:17 PM
Nobody else want to play?

! No longer available (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fwDei3-Nkl8&index=7&list=PL6E8D6FDCFBA07183#)
Title: Re: Poetry
Post by: bababarararacucucudadada on June 26, 2017, 02:07:17 AM
Oh well..

If the first 10 minutes of this doesn't get you going nothing ever will.

https://www.bbc.co.uk/iplayer/episode/p056cf3l/glastonbury-2017-kate-tempest#group=p056kg71 (https://www.bbc.co.uk/iplayer/episode/p056cf3l/glastonbury-2017-kate-tempest#group=p056kg71)

Wow.
Title: Re: Poetry
Post by: bababarararacucucudadada on June 28, 2017, 01:00:57 AM
http://youtu.be/zC9Ni-IPnAc (http://youtu.be/zC9Ni-IPnAc)
Title: Re: Poetry
Post by: Return of the Mac on June 28, 2017, 01:32:59 AM
I like limericks :)
Title: Re: Poetry
Post by: Q13.1 on June 28, 2017, 03:17:36 AM
Isn't Poetry, a stag do weekend destination in Poland?  ???
Title: Re: Poetry
Post by: Je on June 28, 2017, 07:15:33 AM
Roses are red
Violets are blue
I'm on Random Banter
So are you
Title: Re: Poetry
Post by: bababarararacucucudadada on June 28, 2017, 10:53:53 AM
Roses are red
Violets are blue
Most poems rhyme
But this one don't
Title: Re: Poetry
Post by: Je on June 28, 2017, 11:28:53 AM
Daffodils are yellow
Pansies are purple
Daisies are white
A fish


Title: Re: Poetry
Post by: Q13.1 on June 28, 2017, 12:00:11 PM
Here is a poem for thee
I made up as easily as one two three:

I can be a poet
when I am on it
given the time
on a dime
I can write a ryhme
Comes to me
so easily
when I need a pee
pissed out of my brains
I can't refrain
from a ryhme or three
it is like a diesease to me.
Watching Star Trek
on daytime TV
I wonder what the heck
has happened to me.
So easily I can be pleased with me
unfortunately
this is not the way it should be :)

I am a poet
and I do know it.
Reciting in school
oh what a tool
I looked like a fool.
But one day
it came my way
Looking like dandy
it became quite handy
Writing on a forum
with such decorum.

 :ROFL:

Shall I carry on
or has my time run? ...................

Dear Barbar
I hope hope you won't harbour
any displeasure
with your conjecture
that poetry
was not something
I could try

There's one in your eye! :)

Marks out of ten
for my effort just then.
Title: Re: Poetry
Post by: Q13.1 on June 28, 2017, 12:26:29 PM
I may continue
to add to this
with innuendo
But my poor brain
it may end up drained

So I will say
Good day. :)
Title: Re: Poetry
Post by: bababarararacucucudadada on June 28, 2017, 12:29:27 PM
I'm loathe to award marks because that infers a hierarchy if merit that rather misses the point of any artistic endeavour which may be to communicate, engage, amuse and, occasionally, to provoke and my assessment is that you have communicated your engagement to such great effect that it has provoked this response.
Title: Re: Poetry
Post by: Q13.1 on June 28, 2017, 12:31:07 PM
I'm loathe to award marks because that infers a hierarchy if merit that rather misses the point of any artistic endeavour which may be to communicate, engage, amuse and, occasionally, to provoke and my assessment is that you have communicated your engagement to such great effect that it has provoked this response.

This poem doesn't rhyme :(  Doesn't even have any stanzas.
Title: Re: Poetry
Post by: bababarararacucucudadada on June 28, 2017, 12:33:54 PM
This poem doesn't rhyme :(  Doesn't even have any stanzas.


This one does.

http://youtu.be/hV7jm6XTd2Q?t=53 (http://youtu.be/hV7jm6XTd2Q?t=53)

Used to have hysterics with my boy reading that when he was little.
Title: Re: Poetry
Post by: Q13.1 on June 28, 2017, 12:37:35 PM
This one does.

[url]http://youtu.be/hV7jm6XTd2Q?t=53[/url] ([url]http://youtu.be/hV7jm6XTd2Q?t=53[/url])

Used to have hysterics with my boy reading that when he was little.


Bob? (http://randombanter.net/index.php?topic=10146.0)

Dr Suess :)
Title: Re: Poetry
Post by: bababarararacucucudadada on June 28, 2017, 01:00:21 PM
I prefer to keep such personal details off messageboards.

I wouldn't want to upset Jacob Trevor Roberto de Pfeffel Wayne Tarquin Reginald Bababarararacucucudadada by revealing his full name.
Title: Re: Poetry
Post by: bababarararacucucudadada on June 28, 2017, 09:45:29 PM
A Brief History of Modern Art in Poetry.

(https://pbs.twimg.com/media/DDbpznCXgAAIjh-.jpg)

Shamelessly stolen from https://twitter.com/brian_bilston.
Title: Re: Poetry
Post by: Q13.1 on June 28, 2017, 09:59:48 PM
Barbar:

You are taking this poetry stuff quite serious.
It is almost making me quite delirious.
Title: Re: Poetry
Post by: bababarararacucucudadada on June 28, 2017, 10:13:42 PM
There are holes in the sky
Where the rain gets in
But they're ever so small
That's why the rain is thin.

- Spike Milligan
Title: Re: Poetry
Post by: Q13.1 on June 28, 2017, 10:18:48 PM
There are holes in the sky
Where the rain gets in
But they're ever so small
That's why the rain is thin.

- Spike Milligan

Come on then one of your own :)
Title: Re: Poetry
Post by: bababarararacucucudadada on June 28, 2017, 11:28:50 PM
Bababarararacucucudadada
Is a mouthful in any language
And a name not in common usage

Bababa is more concise
And would sound rather nice
From the lips of Mamama to Dadada

But Dadaists may scoff
"Enough is enough.
Dissing our art is a sacrilege."

So go your own way
And I'll have my own say
And enjoy Q's input
As accomplice

So bababa is good
Because rarara sounds posh
And cucucu though seasonal
Is far too attritional
And dadada sounds too much like ta ta


Title: Re: Poetry
Post by: bababarararacucucudadada on June 28, 2017, 11:47:19 PM
You might want one about cricket, Q.

Test Match Special - The Ashes Poem by Murray Lachlan Young

Itís time again for twenty-two
To stand fore-square upon the turf
The baggy green and navy blue
Let cork and leather strike the earth

The willow-crack the ball in flight
Oh quicken hearts and hungers burn
The gold and green, the red and white
In quest to hold the sacred urn

But can it be true what the papers all say?
The Aussies are lost and in deep dissaray?
With talk of indiscipline throwing the book
Of Arthurís dismissal or Warnerís right hook

And will Clarky turn up? Will Watson survive?
Can Agar and Hughes keep the Aussies alive?
Will Trott be on shot? Cook hit the boil?
With KP the nuts and Jimmy the foil

Will England be ruthless and brutally strong?
Or will the whole thing go unfeasibly wrong?
To the echoes of gleeful Australian cries
About rabbits in headlights and Ďchuckersí of pies

For it wouldnít take memeralogical* classes
To recall the Kiwis where kicking our arses
Just six months ago, so shall we say no?
But if asked to place odds, now which way would one go?

For the summer is young and its starting to flow
So itís out with the mic and itís on with the show

Where:

Aggers is anticipating,
Boycs is busy barbilating
Blowers encapsulating
Ashers is corroborating

Vaughny is expostulating,
Grumpers coolly cogitating,
Victor is extrapolating,
Tuffers is discombobulating,

So:

Tune in for patter on bowler the batter
From Devon to Dacca, from here to the WACCA
As cricketing matters went off like the clappers
There isnít a doubt that weíre in for a cracker,

From under to over From Dubai to Dover
To Woolamaloo weíre all here for the test
(Now available on iplayer app)
For the last word in commentary, from the audio promontory,

Of Test match special, quite simply the best

*new word
Title: Re: Poetry
Post by: Q13.1 on June 28, 2017, 11:50:03 PM
I am not going to award marks,
some people may consider me a nark :D
Title: Re: Poetry
Post by: bababarararacucucudadada on June 29, 2017, 08:52:09 PM
This is a longshot.

Some years ago Radio 1 had an Asian Week (or some such). As a part of that week there was a poem about the First Sikh War and how the Rani led the mighty Khalsa in to battle, whilst carrying her child, clad in a white sari before she was cut down by a British sword and the Khalsa was routed. (As depicted in Flashman and The Mountain Of Light if it sounds familiar.)

Any way the poem was brilliant. I have no idea who wrote it and I have no idea what it was called. Any suggestions out there?
Title: Re: Poetry
Post by: Je on June 29, 2017, 09:40:27 PM
https://archive.org/stream/TheFirstPunjabWar-ShahMohammedsJagnamah/TheFirstPunjabWar-ShahMohammedsJagnamah_djvu.txt

?

googled poem about the First Sikh War and how the Rani led the mighty Khalsa
Title: Re: Poetry
Post by: Q13.1 on June 29, 2017, 09:43:24 PM
This is a longshot.

Some years ago Radio 1 had an Asian Week (or some such). As a part of that week there was a poem about the First Sikh War and how the Rani led the mighty Khalsa in to battle, whilst carrying her child, clad in a white sari before she was cut down by a British sword and the Khalsa was routed. (As depicted in Flashman and The Mountain Of Light if it sounds familiar.)

Any way the poem was brilliant. I have no idea who wrote it and I have no idea what it was called. Any suggestions out there?


Fuck me you fucking c**t, what the fuck are you asking you fuck. About some fucking fuck of a fucking poem fuck all of us have a fucking clue and you fucking ask us to fucking help you out what the fuck you fuck, fucking Barbar! :D

Did that ryhme? Was it dada?

Found this though:

Babar ruled over Khurasan and hath terrified Hindustan.

    The Creator taketh no blame to Himself;
    it was death disguised as a Mugal who made war on us.
    Thou, O God, feel pain?
    Creator, Thou belongest to all.

All I can find is this: http://www.sikhfoundation.org/sikh-punjabi-language-studies/punjabi-poetry-on-war-amarjit-chandan/ (http://www.sikhfoundation.org/sikh-punjabi-language-studies/punjabi-poetry-on-war-amarjit-chandan/)

You vain bastard! :D Barbar!!!!
Title: Re: Poetry
Post by: Q13.1 on June 29, 2017, 09:48:27 PM
https://archive.org/stream/TheFirstPunjabWar-ShahMohammedsJagnamah/TheFirstPunjabWar-ShahMohammedsJagnamah_djvu.txt

?

googled poem about the First Sikh War and how the Rani led the mighty Khalsa

Je Barbar is just having one of his turns. It is good of you to humour him ;)
Title: Re: Poetry
Post by: Q13.1 on June 29, 2017, 10:13:25 PM
https://archive.org/stream/TheFirstPunjabWar-ShahMohammedsJagnamah/TheFirstPunjabWar-ShahMohammedsJagnamah_djvu.txt

?

googled poem about the First Sikh War and how the Rani led the mighty Khalsa

Je Barbar is a lovely bloke I am just bantering with him. He once threw threw me in front of a bus, so he deserves all he gets from me here ;)
He didn't even show me the courtesy to throw some bread in the road, thinking I was some kind of a sea gull.

I have looked Barbar and I am sorry to say I can find nothing. There is a movie out there I would love to pin down. Can't find it :(
I know what you could be going through, frustration I think they call it.
Title: Re: Poetry
Post by: Return of the Mac on June 29, 2017, 10:18:33 PM
Babrbs is a wonderful inclusion. And he knows a thing or two about sports.  :D
Title: Re: Poetry
Post by: Q13.1 on June 29, 2017, 10:22:43 PM
Babrbs is a wonderful inclusion. And he knows a thing or two about sports.  :D

I had to beat the shit out of him to get him to come here, also he visited his solicitor to make arrangements in case his belonging here upset Mrs Barbar. I kid you not Mac he told me this in confidence.
Title: Re: Poetry
Post by: Return of the Mac on June 29, 2017, 10:28:33 PM
I had to beat the shit out of him to get him to come here, also he visited his solicitor to make arrangements in case his belonging here upset Mrs Barbar. I kid you not Mac he told me this in confidence.

Tell him, if Mrs Barbs gives him an earful...I am willing to defend him  and offer my services !!! 
Title: Re: Poetry
Post by: bababarararacucucudadada on June 29, 2017, 11:29:26 PM
Je Barbar is a lovely bloke I am just bantering with him. He once threw threw me in front of a bus, so he deserves all he gets from me here ;)
He didn't even show me the courtesy to throw some bread in the road, thinking I was some kind of a sea gull.

I have looked Barbar and I am sorry to say I can find nothing. There is a movie out there I would love to pin down. Can't find it :(
I know what you could be going through, frustration I think they call it.

I did?

Bloody hell.

You'll have to remind me.
Title: Re: Poetry
Post by: bababarararacucucudadada on June 29, 2017, 11:30:25 PM
I had to beat the shit out of him to get him to come here, also he visited his solicitor to make arrangements in case his belonging here upset Mrs Barbar. I kid you not Mac he told me this in confidence.

Quite.
Title: Re: Poetry
Post by: Sven on June 29, 2017, 11:31:43 PM
Visitor is a coward.

He is worse than Frankie Howard.

When bravery calls, Visitor falls, and changes his name to Noel (Coward)

Sorry that it is terrible! I am tired.
Title: Re: Poetry
Post by: bababarararacucucudadada on June 29, 2017, 11:39:10 PM
https://archive.org/stream/TheFirstPunjabWar-ShahMohammedsJagnamah/TheFirstPunjabWar-ShahMohammedsJagnamah_djvu.txt

?

googled poem about the First Sikh War and how the Rani led the mighty Khalsa

I'd obviously been Googling the wrong things.

It is far longer than I recalled (but I missed the start when it was on the radio hence not knowing anything about it).

Many thanks.
Title: Re: Poetry
Post by: Q13.1 on June 30, 2017, 12:00:48 AM
Visitor is a coward.

Fuck vis, I have him covered. ;) Lets get back to Barbar's poetry it is far more fucking entertaining :)

Over to you my friend, this evening's recitation?
Title: Re: Poetry
Post by: bababarararacucucudadada on July 03, 2017, 11:43:09 PM
Inspiration. That's the problem.

Earlier I happened across a poem about pies so I thought I would write one about Pasties.

Quote
PASTIES

To start with there has to be love, desire (not the same thing at all)
And time without either that which must assuredly follow
Cannot. From there artisanal skills once considered
Too mundane for mention take precedence. Sifted flour
Must meet butter and as the powdery dust entombs
Gold they become becrumbed. A dash of cold water
And a sprinkling of salt is all that before
The dough needed is kneaded, worked and set aside to chill
Like a guilty pleasure that you know you will not only
Return to through choice but also because you must.

Potato, swede and onion follow each stripped of identity
Equally by blade of steel and steely determination as spheres
Become dice that will never be rolled. Skirt, sliced
And dusted with a little seasoned flour, edges the concoction
Towards completion. Salt. Pepper. Stir. Be generous! Salt. Pepper. Stir.

The pastry is now as cold as the jar of mayonnaise that
Patiently, fruitlessly awaits its moment in the fridge
And should be rolled until no thicker than a football programme
On a well-floured surface until it has spread enough for
A plate to be used as a circular template for the disc we ultimately
Require. Sharpened steel easily, pleasingly trims away the excess pastry,
For now anyway, with delicious finality. A small mound
Of skirt, onion, swede and potato clown the circus ring, a
Knob of butter provides the music and the skirt soars above it all;
Crimp the moistened pastry edges, pierce the pastry with a small
Hole to allow the steam to elope as the pasty bakes
And paint liberally with beaten egg just as Rothko once
Applied his bespoke oils to canvas. Place the pasty carefully, lovingly
On to a baking tray lined with greaseproof paper and put the tray
Into a pre-heated (gas mark 5) oven for about an hour.

Our work is done. The oven has control now and patience must
Reign beyond it. Maybe you should clear up or have a cup of tea?
Either way you will soon be aware of the delicious aroma that assaults
Your senses creating a yearning almost indecent in its urgency.
Just as Pavlovís dogs once salivated in anticipation then so too do you now.

But our hour is up! Allow the pasty to rest for 10 minutes, if you can!,
Before you devour it. A little anticipation, as though the last hour hasnít
Tantalised enough, never hurt anybody and itíll be all the better for
Cooling slightly. It will. Honest. Now! At last! It is yours! Tuck in! Enjoy!
And if you ignored my advice about cleaning up and having a cup of tea
Earlier and made even more pasties thereíll be more than one
For you to enjoy. Or, better still, give a pasty to somebody you love
and they will repay you in kind because anybody who makes a pasty
For you can show you no deeper, truer love (not the same thing as desire at all -
As asserted at the start of this poem).
Title: Re: Poetry
Post by: Q13.1 on July 05, 2017, 03:23:07 PM
Violets are blue
Pictures of my arse are rude
on facebook.

Roses are red
I am tracked by the feds
on facebook......
Title: Re: Poetry
Post by: Q13.1 on July 05, 2017, 03:24:37 PM
Inspiration. That's the problem.

It is all about you!!!

Write a poem about a wall !
Title: Re: Poetry
Post by: Q13.1 on July 05, 2017, 11:54:00 PM
Fuck that bloody wall
It is there for all
to see.

Fuck it I don't want it next to me.

Painted in pastel shades
I don't want it to parade
my identity.

What shall I do with you
I ask me?

Paint you blue, what kind of hue?
Just something straight foward
I ask you.

Oh wall, you have upset me
I have undertaken an epiphany about thee.

Do you want some wallpaper?
I know I am a mover and shaker.

Perhaps I should just ignore you
but that would bore you

So carry on I will
with my poem

Perhaps I may not be your doyen.

What colour do you want to be?
Black blue or some kind or orangey?

SOrt of of works. A poem about a wall.

Next.................
Title: Re: Poetry
Post by: Q13.1 on July 06, 2017, 12:46:26 AM
Not bad for a pisshead
I know I should be dead
It fills me with me dread

My heart
It is very dark
I fear for what may hark

I listen to music
I find it somewhat elusive

How can this stuff
be enough
to help me out of my malaise?
I know it will take days.

I could carry on
it is easily done

Doesn't take me much effort
comes naturally
Did I take too much LSD?

Well for now
I have to dwell
Do I go and top my glass
or of myself
will I continue you to make an ass?

Your poetry thread
keeps me from bed

Thank you Barbar,
Do you have an arger?
Title: Re: Poetry
Post by: Q13.1 on July 06, 2017, 12:55:18 AM
Want some more?
I may implore
no thank you Paul
there is the door!
Title: Re: Poetry
Post by: Q13.1 on July 06, 2017, 01:09:18 AM
Sorry Barbar,

For some god forsaken reason I can now rhyme off the cuff.

It is not a bluff,
comes to me more naturally
than dentistry.

I must stop now.
It is beginning to gnarl
You must be thinking
Good grief gal!

I know I should not have had LSD
I should have taken tea instead.

Just a reminder from the past
I wonder how long it will last?

:)
Title: Re: Poetry
Post by: bababarararacucucudadada on July 06, 2017, 11:00:35 AM
Good work, son.

I particularly like the inclusion of an invented word ("arger") and the structure too, although inconsistent, pleases.

When the muse takes you it is relatively easy to knock one out, as it were.

My wall has been taken away
Although I call it "mine" I did not ask for it
Somebody else put it there
But nonetheless it was real

I never really focussed on it
Nor was I able to forget it
It just loomed asking a question of me
For which I had no answer

Now it is gone I am free
To ponder without restraint
On matters defined only to myself
And serendesipity.

Title: Re: Poetry
Post by: bababarararacucucudadada on July 08, 2017, 08:16:52 AM
PROPER JOB

An evening out with the wife
Old school Skinheads, real ale, Indonesian beef rendang
Beedelly beedelly beedelly

A stroll down the hill
Ears caressed by birdsong of thrush, blackbird and sparrow
Above deserted streets

The first #8 of the day
Standing room only which came as a surprise
Tho' it is well before 8

Another stroll along Mutley's Plain
England's Skinheads now vanquished by British Lions
I get into my car

Proper job.
Title: Re: Poetry
Post by: Je on July 15, 2017, 10:18:14 AM
If anyone fancies a crack at greeting cards...

http://www.sps.com/poetry/ (http://www.sps.com/poetry/)

Can send them stuff outside of the competition too:

http://www.sps.com/help/writers_guidelines.html (http://www.sps.com/help/writers_guidelines.html)
Title: Re: Poetry
Post by: Visitor on October 19, 2017, 03:22:29 PM


Pick a sky and name it


http://www.bbc.co.uk/programmes/b098n8z9 (http://www.bbc.co.uk/programmes/b098n8z9)

 Momtaza Mehr is the real deal and the music background of the programme is wonderful.

A triumph of a programme.
Title: Re: Poetry
Post by: New World on October 25, 2017, 11:26:48 AM
I wrote this after a particulalrly depressing gym workout about three years ago.


The Body

No engineer could oil the joints.
Myriad movements, some unseen, many unheard
A void of pain, as he worked for the gain of strength and immortality
Asking little, not often, 'What on earth is the point?'

Imagine the steam, hissing from the holes
Straining fulcrums, pivots, some creaking, many rubbing
Devoid of ambition, a gym rat on a mission upon the eternal wheel
Breathing heavy, rusty lungs within an ageing soul.

Which device of misery to choose next
The dizzying array of machines, to stretch this muscle and that
A pit of good intentions, arm and leg extensions for now apparent win
A prize of tennis elbow, tortured knees and a fucking sore neck.


2013
Title: Re: Poetry
Post by: Je on October 29, 2017, 06:52:17 PM
I wrote this after a particulalrly depressing gym workout about three years ago.


The Body


Good stuff when re-read a couple of times...

*no* apparent win?

Title: Re: Poetry
Post by: New World on October 30, 2017, 10:29:24 AM
Good stuff when re-read a couple of times...

*no* apparent win?

Indeed, yes.

Thanks  :)
Title: Re: Poetry
Post by: Q13.1 on November 08, 2017, 02:00:13 AM
I am an angry passionate soul,
screaming out,
in this torturous mediocrity.

Google it.
Title: Re: Poetry
Post by: bababarararacucucudadada on November 12, 2017, 04:06:06 PM
(https://pbs.twimg.com/media/DK0GWGHW0AAzc3T.jpg)